Nature... who needs it?!?!

Not I. Especially last night... I was thiiiiiiiiiiiiis close to packing up my bags and taking the first flight back to my cement paradise home that is New York City! Well, not really but that's certainly what I wanted to do!

I was attacked last night while getting out of my car. I had just gotten home from work, it was close to midnight. I'd been singing Defying Gravity in the car and so it was with a wide open mouth that I met my assailant as I opened my car door. Once, twice, thrice it hit me in the face! Shocked and quite frightened I (first- shut my mouth!) fought back at my still invisible foe. I managed to avert any more attacks to the face and instead began to receive them in the torso. Madly, I swatted and punched in vain as the tricky little thing continue to evade me. It mocked me with a most unnatural laughter. "Click click cliiiiiiiiiick!"After what seemed like an eternity of this life and death struggle, my opponent tired and fell on my lap. I finally got a good look at my assailant and only then did I scream...

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I jumped up out of my seat and slammed the door shut, thus trapping the vile monster. Then I realized I had also trapped my purse and lunchpack in there with it. Crud! I then did the only thing I could: swiftly I ran up my front steps and called for my Prince in Shining Armor! So genteel, he left his own battles with fearsome foes ( a Boss) to come rescue his damsel in distress. "Quickly, my sword, madam!" I ran and fetched his beautifully (factory) crafted Mag-Lite and stood back while my beloved slay the beast for good. "Crunch...splat...crunch crunch!"

Oh the horror. Seriously...

After 6 years of living in Oklahoma (and all its trees and bugs) I still just can't handle nature/grass/bugs. I am making strides though, little as they may be... a few weekends ago I actually sat on grass with no blanket under me!!! Some day I may even work up the nerve to walk in it barefoot (ugh, that gives me the heebiejeebies just thinking about it!) but not just yet. Me and all that green stuff just don't get along very well...